9 Moments When Japanese Women Re-evaluate You

You don’t necessarily get a bad rap, but you just don’t give off a good impression. She’s been feeling apprehensive about you, but then one day, you did something that totally changed her opinion about you. So, what exactly did you do? What can you do to have her reconsider you as a love interest? We asked Japanese women aged between their teens and mid-20s to discover some of these “Aha!” moments.

  • 1. You help her carry heavy boxes at work.

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    “I thought he’d be the last person on earth to help me carry things. It was so unexpected, and now he’s been on my mind,” confesses a young Japanese woman in her early 20s. Helping her out at work, especially when she’s feeling at a disadvantage, will dramatically change her views about you. Practice lending a hand daily so that when the moment arrives, you’ll be ready to extend a helping hand to her.

  • 2. You inquire about her health and general well being.

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    “When I’m not feeling well, a little compassion goes a long way,” explains one Japanese woman in her late teens. When she’s not at her best, she feels vulnerable and emotional. If you notice that she doesn’t look well or she’s hurt, show her that you care. Be compassionate and inquire if she’s been feeling okay.

  • 3. You give up your seat to the elderly and pregnant women.

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    “He looks like he doesn’t care anyone but him, but I saw him giving his seat up to an old lady on the train. I’m in love!” blushes young Japanese woman in her 20s. Don’t limit yourself to the elderly and pregnant women—spread acts of kindness to anyone who may need a helping hand. You never know who’s watching, so start helping today.

  • 4. You open the door for her.

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    “He doesn’t particularly look like an approachable person, but he always opens the door for me and I’ve started to think that he may be a gentleman,” one Japanese woman in her late 20s commented, curious about her colleague. No woman dislikes being treated like a lady or with respect. Don’t be superficial, though. Practice good manners daily so you’ll be ready to swing into action.

  • 5. You smile when you talk to her.

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    “I asked him a question and he answered me with a great smile. He made me smile, too,” one Japanese woman shares, hinting that a smile is contagious. If you’ve been told that you look standoffish or distant, perhaps you’re not smiling enough. If you’re too timid to smile at her, start small with a simple greeting in the morning and a grin.

  • 6. You thanked her with a smile.

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    “I didn’t think he was the type to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’. It’s a revelation for me. Don’t ever judge a book by its cover!” a surprised Japanese woman in her 20s tells us. It’s common sense, but many adults don’t have the courtesy to say these simple words. Japanese women are particularly sensitive to manners, and being aware of that will definitely impress her. You may even add a personal touch and give a big smile.

  • 7. You adore animals.

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    “There’s something about people who adore animals. In my book, they’re kind-hearted people,” explains one Japanese woman in her 20s. The way you treat small animals may be a reflection of how compassionate you are. You don’t need to show her mouth feeding your dog or anything crazy, but if you have a pet or you like animals, show her that you care about all living creatures.

  • 8. You pick up the slack that no one else wanted to deal with.

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    “I respect individuals who are always willing to go the extra mile,” said a Japanese woman in her late 20s. If you make a sacrifice for the bigger group, she may fall in love with you for displaying a high degree of selflessness and responsibility. These are the qualities not only women but also everyone around you will recognize and appreciate.

  • 9. She sees you feeling down.

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    “I have the notion that men are strong, but when I saw him really depressed over something, I wanted to be there to help him,” recalls one Japanese woman in her 20s. In this case, her maternal instinct kicked in when she witnessed your vulnerable side. However, don’t let this be a frequent occurrence, or you’ll just appear weak and gloomy.

Last updated: March 18, 2018