Sex is even more enjoyable when two people have built up some trust in each other. That’s why there are things you probably should not bring up in the early stages of a relationship: there’s no foundation of trust yet, and you may turn her off. So we surveyed our Japanese female readers to bring you 9 Turnoffs for Japanese girls on the First Night with a New Partner.
“I really don’t like it, and if he keeps on pushing for it I get turned off.” Some Japanese girls just don’t feel any pleasure from stimulation to their anus, so no matter how much you like it, try not to do it on the first night. Not all Japanese girls enjoy it. Try it later, when you know each other better and you can assess her reaction.
“It’s actually really scary when it’s my first night with a new partner.” Blindfolds can definitely add to the excitement and sensation, but on the first night with a new partner it can be scary. If you really want to try something of that sort, you can cover her eyes with your hands or hold her wrist or arm lightly so she knows she can always break loose.
“I’m not the submissive type so I don’t really enjoy it…” It’s definitely important to confirm what kind of play your new partner likes before venturing off into something like this. If you do want to do something along the lines of BDSM, make sure you confirm with her that she is OK with it and, if so, ask her if she prefers being the submissive one or the dominant one. You should also agree on a “safe word” that either one of you can use to stop the action at any time.
“When he asks me to do this I feel like he doesn’t value me as much.” Some Japanese girls don’t like to give blowjobs anyway, so don’t coerce her into it if she doesn’t want to. Even if she does, if you push her head down then she will feel even more offended and hurt. Start by asking her if she will lick it and give her the option of saying no.
“It gets annoying and the more he forces it the more I get turned off.” Some Japanese girls just don’t like dirty talk, and no matter how much you push it, she just won’t get turned on. This may cause some friction between you. Try and gauge her reaction to a little bit the first night and if she seems to like that stuff, bring it on the next time, too. If she doesn’t, drop it until you know each other better.
“I’ve never used it before so I was just too nervous; it didn’t even feel good.” Not all Japanese girls use toys, so if it’s her first time using it, she might feel lost. Ask her if she’s interested in using toys before you bring the toy out.
“I didn’t think he would be so violent, I was so scared.” When it comes to the first night, it’s really hard to tell if it’s a sexual quirk or just plain violence. In order not to frighten her on the first night, don’t say harsh words or call her names. You can try a different approach with dirty talk and say things like “you’re so erotic and irresistible,” as this is more likely to put her at ease.
“I don’t get what’s so fun about it…” Even if you lightheartedly ask her to do some cosplay, some Japanese girls may get turned off if they aren’t interested. If you learn that she does like cosplay, save it for later so you have something to look forward to.
“I’ll think he’s a pervert and will get weirded out.” Even if it feels natural to you, it could come off as absurd, especially on the first night. An inexperienced woman may even label you as a pervert and you may ruin her night. Keep things more conventional on the first night just to be safe.
Last updated: October 07, 2017